(PCM) There are hundreds of different dating terms out there these days, but one of the newest ones you should definitely know the definition of is “cushioning”! We can all agree that dating can be difficult and people for some reason just can’t seem to make up their minds about who they choose to be with these days, so they figured, ‘The heck with it, why not just have it all’ and hence we have situations known as ‘cushioning’ occur.
According to Urban Dictionary, ‘Cushioning’ refers to “A dating technique where along with your main piece you also have several ‘cushions,’ other people you’ll chat and flirt with to cushion the potential blow of your main break-up and not leave you alone.’ Yeah, I don’t think it’s going that well with Dave. Luckily I’ve been cushioning him with Pablo and Gary.’ ”
Ouch! Apparently, ‘cushioning’ has been around for quite some time, but has often been referred to as simply keeping another individual on the ‘back burner’ or ‘waiting in the wings’. While the “Pablo’s” and the “Gary’s” are probably loving all the attention, our man “Dave” there is the one getting the worst of the situation. ‘Cushioning’ can be likened to cheating without actually cheating.
While you may not physically be hooking up with any of these other individuals, you are building them up and giving them hope that something like that may occur in the future. Many do not even realize that there is a significant other in the picture in the first place and may just feel that the person is simply playing hard to get. Either way, having any type of intimate conversation or flirtation with someone who is not your significant other can certainly be looked at as cheating and is definitely a cause for major concern in most relationships.
Keeping someone for a rebound is not only unfair to them, but unfair to your significant other as well. There is a level of dishonesty in play when checking to see if the grass will be greener in other pastures. It is really not any different that actual cheating. Using someone for a ‘cushion’ is just wrong. The only way a relationship can work is if both people are truly committed to see it’s growth and success. If one person is always looking elsewhere and not willing to put in the work than it will never be beneficial to anyone. We have become a society that want’s our cake and to eat it too and situations such as ‘cushioning’ are what is bringing down sanctity of relationships and will continue to do so until people begin opening their eyes to make a change.